Lonely Years (four actually)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I have often pondered the saying that highschool gets lonelier and lonelier for those that try and live according to God's standards. I never use to understand this. During my early years of highschool, I considered myself a Christian. And, in my defense, I was. I was just a Christian who did not have a growing relationship with God. I was an unaware stagnant who was content with my daily prayers before bed and weekly church attendance. I did not understand why Christians said highschool was lonely for them because I called myself a Christian and it was not lonely for me. I figured they must be doing something wrong, when in fact, I was the one doing it wrong. I was never popular, but I would like to believe I was well liked. I had quite a few friends. I was not lonely. But I was not living the life God called me to live. I was compromising my morals and better judgment. I felt I had to apologize for my beliefs to my non-christian friends--most of my friends were non--christians. I think my first issue was not having a core group of belivers who were supporting me and encoruaging me to grow. Instead, I had a core group of non-belivers who were making me feel like I needed to become more like them in order to find true fulfillment. Eventually, I started to believe them, and follow them. I cannot say during the early years of highschool that God was on the forefront of my heart. I wanted the benifits of being a christian without having to put forth the effort of following him. Then this summer happened. It was a complete culture shock for me coming from a highschool where I was the most spiritually mature, to a community of believers that took living for God to a level I did not think was possible. I went from apologizing to my friends for being "too Christian" to apologizing to God for not having the kind of relationship with him that I saw on the faces and hearts of these solid christians who had nothing in their hearts greater than The Lord. They say you become like those that you surround yourself with. That was true for me in early highschool, and praise God, that was true for me this summer. I did not think Christians like that existed. I always thought I had reached the peak of spiritual maturity. However, being surrounded by believers who passionatly loved The Lord and earnestly sought after him everyday, made me realize I was one of the most spiritually immature out of the whole lot. My outlook on life changed that summer, and coming back in to highschool as a different person, I knew things would change. I heard people tell me that I would lose friends, that it would become lonely for me. I heard their words, but part of me did not believe it. I do not think I truly believed that any of my friends would desert me because of my reveived heart. I was wrong. Matthew !10:22 says: "You will be hated because of me", If I am not liked by everyone it means I am doing someting right. If I am loved by everyone, I have some serious evealutating to do. If I thought coming from highschool to camp was a culture shock, I had no idea was I was in for going from camp back to the highschool. I spent the first few weeks of school completely baffled, depressed, and utterly lonely. I went from a place of believers that grieved over their sins to a building where people flaunted them. I was forced to see my surroundings with fresh eyes, and it burned. I had grown numb to the words and actions of others, I had accepted that this is just the way people act. But camp had shown me that was a lie. I did in fact lose friends. The once insperable friends are now just passing faces in the halls. Romans 12:2 says: "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world," this means even the socially accpeted sins of lying, cheating on tests, gossiping, drinking, partying, and slanderous speech. That verse should go on to say that living that out in highschool is not glorified. It is mocked. and scoffed at. People feel like you are judging them if you choose to live dfferently. As a result they choose not to be around you. It is a sad, but very real truth. It cost me popularity. It cost me friends. It cost me social acceptance. It cost me being able to ignore the sin around me--before it did not faze me, now it physically hurts me. I once enjoyed the latest gossip, as I believe, every girl does, but now hearing people talk badly of another person makes my heart ache for them, no matter what they have done or what kind of person they are. It makes me sad that I have already reached a point where I am ready for highschool to be over. It makes me sad that this world makes living for God such a difficult task. But I do it with a light heart. Highschool ends, and the choices we make in those brief years will haunt us for the rest of our lives. It is so easy to get sucked into the here and now. The feeling that all the parties and boyfriends and sports events are so imortant, when in five years they will not even bear any significance to the grand scheme of your life. Highschool ends. And the sooner we come to realize that compromising our faith is not worth momentary popularity, the more content and fulfilled we will be. I may not have a million friends, but I have genuine, solid, christian friends now. I may not have social acceptance, but I have acceptance from the creator of the universe. And when we look at it from that angle, is not trade a wonderful one? Isaiah 40:31 "You can have all this world, just give me Jesus."  

The Double Standard

Can we be real for a moment? Like. For two seconds can we be honest about what is going on in society right now? You're going to have to be a bit more specific, Sarah. There is quite a bit going on in society right now... Correct. There is a lot going on in society right now and each issue is just as important as the next. Except, we have to choose our battles, right? So which monster am I pulling out from under the bed tonight, you ask? Why do we not start with the infuriating double standard that Christians are supposed to live by. Society is all about "acceptance" and "coexisting" and "say what you want" and all that "all streams eventually lead to the ocean" except for the fact that some streams lead to Hell, but that is taboo, right? We do not talk about the fact that if someone is right that means everyone else is wrong, and that all those other streams we think are going to "eventually lead to the ocean" will never make it to the ocean. They are going to dry up and all those fishies are going to die. No matter how much they believed they would end up in the ocean. All the positive thoughts in the world, all the "good deeds", and all the self improvements will get you nowhere if you are living a lie. This world wants acceptance for everyone. Everyone except Christians. Everyone else is applauded for their individualistic opinions, but Christians are regarded as narrow minded followers blinded by the opinions of their parents. Why am I not allowed to share my opinion without offending everyone, but the greater population is allowed to bash everything I believe, slander my creator, and disrespect the very life I live, and it is totally acceptable? Is the way I live that threatening to you? I think the main reason the world has so much beef with Christians is that we claim to be right. We are right. We have the truth, and not the "kind of" truth. We have absolute, 100%, not a doubt in our mind truth. and that scares people. In society we are supposed to be unsure about everything, because being sure about anything says you are narrow minded. I don't buy it. Why claim to "believe" something if you mindset is "well it might be right or it might not be right" NO! Whatever you claim to put your faith in you better believe that you are diving in head first with no hindrance. But that mindset scares the crap out of people. What if I am wrong? What if they are right? How can anyone be sure? "Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see" Hebrews 11:1 To believe in anything takes faith, and if we do not completely but into what we claim as our "religion" than we are neither sure nor certain. So excuse me if I have no doubts whatsoever because I have found truth while you are still wandering around in the dark. I am sorry if The light I am shedding into the pitch black is offending you, but truth does that sometimes. You want me to doubt what I believe. You want me to say "Maybe I am right. Maybe I am not right. Maybe we are all right in our own little ways." But thats the thing. I can not do that. Because guess what? When you know something for a fact. When your life has been drastically changed by a sovereign Lord, you no longer doubt, and you will never deny the truth. All religions can not be right. I am sorry. They cannot. And that is why Christianity is so hated. Because while other religions have their beliefs, they also do not claim to be right. but, guess what? I do. Because I AM. and that is infuriating for you to read, because you want me to doubt myself, think "Maybe not." The creator of the universe came to earth to die the death of crucifixion for MY SINS and ALL THE SINS OF THE WORLD and HE LOVES ME AND HAS CHANGED MY LIFE AND GIVEN ME JOY AND RESCUED ME FROM THE BOTTOMLESS PIT THAT WAS THE RESULT OF MY SINS. You are on crack if you think I am going to even think about saying "Maybe not."  So that your faith will not rest on human wisdom but on God's power 1 Corinthians 2:5      

Priorities for the God Starved

This last weekend I have the privilege of attending the True Woman's conference in my home state, little did I know that such an impactful weekend would compel me to start a blog. Who even does that anymore? Are not blogs reserved for, you know, middle aged woman who like to broadcast pictures of their "adorable little babies" and by babies I mean scrawny little dogs that look more like naked rats? So why would God be calling me to the deposition of a spinster? You see. Teenagers, in my case teenage girls, we have this problem. We like to make ourselves busy. In my town, I am known as the girls who does...everything: Soccer, swimming & diving, Tack & pole-vaulting, the Fall plays, the Spring Musicals, I am a member of the Show Choir, President of Key Club, member of FCA, PEERS, Speech Team, NHS, part of my school's Newspaper staff, and formally a member of P.R.I.D.E. (We will get to why I am no longer a member in a minute). This is not even including the hours of A.P. homework I must take the time to complete every night. I have always seen the lack of being involved in something at all times as laziness and God frowns on laziness, right? Well you see, we teenagers, we make ourselves so busy that God, the one person we should be making a priority, is neglected and thrown haphazardly on the back-burner of our already too-full schedule. Read my bible? Forget it. I have two hours worth of AP US History reading to do. You want me to spend precious time I could be spending on that essay I have to write for Honors English that is due tomorrow praying? What is that going to do for me? Yeah sure. God is important. But studying. Now that is actually important. Studying is going to benefit me in the future. I will focus on God when I have more time. You want to talk to me about priorities? I have to maintain this 4.0 (I wish) and get into a good college, so I can get a good job, and make a lot of money, and live my whole life way too busy for God. You see, we think "once I get my life figured out and life slows down a little then I will become serious about my faith. Once I get my dream job, then I will become a solid christian." Sitting in those squeaky plastic chairs in a room full of five hundred girls I was hit in the gut. Being busy was my life. I loved it. I loved the pressure. The schedule. Feeling important. Needed. Recognized. and accomplished, knowing that I has so much on my plate and I still managed to come out on top of the stress. I thought I was making myself a stronger person. In reality, I was just making myself a self-sufficient fool who thought she did not need God. Let me make something very clear. Everyone needs God. And the only thing that distinguishes one needy sinner from the next is their willingness to admit their need for God. Anyway. Back to my monotonous story. You are still with me, right? I never made a conscious effort that I was going to compromise God for all of my activities, but that is what ended up happening. Slowly I started seeing getting the things I was involved with as more important, more pressing, more beneficial, than growing in my relationship with God. This summer I rededicated my life to Christ, but coming back to the rush of school I found myself back into the pressing routine. I knew I needed this year to be different than my last two years in high school because of the drastic change God had made in my heart, but I did not know how without giving up everything. (Here is the funny part ladies and gents. God asks that we give up everything and follow him. Just food for thought.) Ironically, it was my parents who saw my need to slim down my schedule before I did. Naturally, anything they said I needed to do I immediately vowed i would prove them wrong. However. We foolish teens do not realize no matter what we vow, that they are in control of our lives. and much against my will i was forced to eliminate the least important thing off my list. But it is all important. And when I refused to make a decision. They made it for me. I was no longer to be a member of P.R.I.D.E. It seems silly that such a small act would cause such grief in me, but it did. "You still have so much to do" you must be thinking. But I also have another issue. I do not quit. ever. I never have. And I saw not continuing something to the next season as quitting. "You really are crazy" yeah. I know. Get like me....Actually don't. That is kind of the whole point of this blog. The speaker at the woman's conference said we should be doing big things for the kingdom of God Right Now. Not in ten years. Not once we graduate. But now. you see, i struggled with this. I want to become a writer. A public speaker. I want to minister to people. to reach the world for god through my words. But I have to go to college first! I have to get a degree! She said I didn't. She asked us to close our eyes and open our hearts to God's calling. What does God want me to do for his kingdom at this very stage in my life? "Sarah, start a blog" Start a bible study? "Sarah, how about writing a blog" Give up social media? "Sarah, use the talents you want to use in the future right now" Love people more? "SARAH GRACE ROGERS. START A BLOG" lord, what if I started a blog? "Hm. why didn't I think of that. Good idea Sarah" Thus LET NO ONE LOOK DOWN ON YOU BECAUSE OF YOUR YOUTH was born. Because I do not have to be a college graduate with a degree to reach people with my words. To shake the very ground I stand on. I can do that now. And just because I am young does not mean God cannot use me. I cannot say I have quit everything i am involved in and spend my days reading the word of God. I wish I could. But i am a sinner and God is still working on my heart. But I no longer squeeze God into the few seconds before I fall into a sleep induced stupor. I make my time with God a priority, and as a result I have come to see my fault in relying on my own strength to pull me through my homework all nighters. So that is the story of the creation of my blog. Sorry it did not take seven days to complete, but by the look of how long this thing turned out, maybe it did. (you'll never knowww). Peace out home skillets.  

      Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet and listened to his teaching. But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.” But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:38-42